


home coming

by harinezumi_kun



Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-04-30
Updated: 2010-04-30
Packaged: 2017-11-04 13:55:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/394616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/harinezumi_kun/pseuds/harinezumi_kun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>nino goes to america. when he comes back, he has something important to say to ohno.</p>
            </blockquote>





	home coming

_Prologue_

Nino makes sure to walk slowly and calmly away from the set. He makes sure to pull open the door to the makeup trailer gently, and is equally careful not to slam it. Despite how angry he is, he is determined not to show it. There will be no diva tantrums for him, no matter how many times he gets bawled out in front of the rest of the cast and crew.

With measured steps he walks to his usual chair in front of the mirror and picks up the rented cell phone he has been using since coming to America. He has the number of his long-distance phonecard programmed in, so it doesn’t take nearly as long as it could to get connected. As the ringer begins to jangle in his ear, Nino realizes belatedly that it’s something like 3 a.m. in Japan. But he doesn’t hang up.

After a dozen rings the line connects, and a groggy voice mumbles, “H’lo?” 

Nino smiles a little to himself. The sound of that voice takes some of the tightness out of his chest, but for some reason makes his throat close up almost painfully. He gives a short cough before replying.

“Hey. It’s me.”

The voice on the other end pauses, and Nino can hear a long, slow exhalation. “…Nino?”

“Aah.”

“Oh. Is something wrong?”

“Not really,” Nino lies. He rests an arm on the dressing table and lowers his head. “I was just thinking…that I miss you, Oh-chan.”

“I miss you, too,” Ohno replies, and Nino thinks he can hear the little smile tugging at Ohno’s lips.

For a few long moments, they say nothing. Nino was hoping the call to Leader would make him feel better—it usually does—but this time he’s just finding it harder and harder to breathe, and his eyes are starting to burn and blur. He closes them and presses his face into his sleeve. On the other end of the line, Ohno just breathes steadily. Nino thinks he probably fell back to sleep. Eventually, though, it’s Leader who breaks the silence.

“Is it hard?”

Nino swallows before answering. “It’s hard.”

“…You want to come home?”

“I want to come home,” Nino says, more quickly than he means to, his voice cracking on the last word. “But…”

“…you just have to keep trying, ne,” Ohno finishes for him. “It’ll be okay. Just do things your own way, at your own pace.”

Nino wants to give a biting reply, but only sniffles.

“It’s okay to cry,” Ohno continues in the same quiet voice. “And it’s okay not to be strong all the time.”

“Oh-chan,” Nino says finally.

“Mmm?”

“…I miss you.”

“You said that already,” Ohno says with a sleepy chuckle.

“Oh,” and Nino realizes he has his voice back, “I guess I did.”

There are another few moments of quiet as Nino sits up and drags a sleeve quickly across his face. “Well, that’s all.”

“That’s all?”

“Yeah. You can go back to sleep.”

“Oh. Okay.”

“And…thanks.”

“No problem.”

“Goodnight, Oh-chan.”

“’Night, Nino.”

After he hangs up, Nino gets the feeling that “I miss you” isn’t really what he wanted to say. But whatever it is he wants to say, it’s probably going to have to wait till he’s back in Japan.

***

_home coming_

Nino learned a lot of things about himself during the trip to America. He learned how to stretch his limits as an actor, he learned how hard it was for him to be so far from everyone he knew, learned that he could deal with all the stress—kind of enjoyed it, even—and that he hated having no hair.

But one of the most important revelations he had didn’t hit him until he was about to step off the plane at Narita Airport, back in Japan again after three months of filming.

He was in love.

In the end, it wasn’t a revelation so much as an affirmation of something he had always known but refused to acknowledge. Being in love—with anyone—was a lot of trouble when you were in the popstar-actor-idol business. But being in love with your best friend and fellow band member was even worse.

He couldn’t deny it anymore, though. While he had been gone, he had thought of Ohno everyday. While drifting off to sleep, Nino would wonder what Ohno was doing. When he had the time to make a phone call, Ohno was almost always the first person he called. Over the course of three months, he had exhausted almost a hundred dollars on postcards to send to Ohno—and considering how cheap postcards were, that was rather telling.

So, Nino decided, now that he was back in Japan, he would have to confess.

***

But if he’s honest with himself, he’s actually extremely relieved that it’s his family and his manager that meet him at the airport. Of course he’s looking forward to seeing Arashi—and Ohno—but with his imminent confession at the forefront of his mind, he’s glad he has a little time to organize his thoughts before coming face to face with the object of his affections.

The ride back to his apartment isn’t that exciting. His sister chatters endlessly, and he receives a number of text messages congratulating him on being home safely, along with other well wishes. Nothing from Ohno, though. He tries not to dwell on it. Knowing Leader, he probably doesn’t even remember that Nino is coming home today. 

Once they all arrive at Nino’s apartment complex, his manager bids them farewell and drives off, leaving Nino’s mother and sister to help him carry his things upstairs. As usual, both women express concern (laced with disgust) over the state of Nino’s living space, but he refuses their offers to help clean or cook (and besides, there’s nothing edible in the fridge—why would there be, when he’s been gone for three months?) 

However, like Nino, they are not overly sentimental and don’t stay too long. Once they are gone, Nino makes a half-hearted effort at unpacking, then decides he can do it later and settles in with a first-person shooter he brought back from America. He knows he’ll also have to get food eventually, but there’s a Family Mart five minutes away that should have some perfectly good (and cheap) dinner options.

Just when his stomach is beginning to growl, the doorbell rings. Nino pauses his game and rises to his feet, groaning when he realizes the position he was sitting in has caused them to go numb. The walk to the door is more of a stumbling shuffle, and he’s so busy tying to keep his balance, he doesn’t even think to look through the peephole. 

So it’s a complete surprise to find Ohno standing there.

After the first jolt of shock, Nino dazedly takes in Leader’s hesitant smile, and the bulging plastic bags he’s carrying in either hand.

“Surprise…” Ohno says, sounding a little nervous, maybe thrown off by Nino’s open-mouthed expression of consternation. “I figured you’d be too lazy to buy yourself any real food,” he begins to explain, “so I stopped by Aiba’s parents’ place—”

Nino’s not really sure what inspires him to launch himself at the older man, but suddenly he has his arms around Ohno’s neck and his face buried in Ohno’s collar. The scent of Ohno’s aftershave or shampoo or whatever it is that he always smells like overwhelms Nino for a moment. His mind is blank, but for the thought _He’s here_ , and for a moment time is frozen.

“It’s nice to see you too,” Ohno chuckles softly. His arms are stuck out awkwardly to the sides, still full of Chinese food.

With a little jerk, Nino realizes this is a rather abrupt kind of a greeting, and quickly turns the gesture into a headlock, pulling Ohno along into the apartment. “I’m starving!” he invents, pausing to give Ohno time to step out of his shoes. “I was just overcome with happiness at the sight of all that food.”

Ohno takes the statement at face value, with a quiet “hai, hai”, and begins setting food out on the low table in Nino’s living room.

There are a few moments of awkwardness, as Nino is for once at a loss for something to say, and Leader isn’t particularly talkative. Ohno doesn’t seem to notice, but as Nino sinks down next to the older man on the floor he feels like the universe is trying to send him a message. _Here he is,_ it says, _don’t wait—tell him now_. 

But he can’t. How could he possibly confess to Ohno right here and now, not two minutes after he’s walked through the door? Of course he wants to tell him, and knows he will, eventually (probably), and hell he’s got all night, so it’s not like he has to say something at this exact moment. Still, here’s Ohno, who’s never shown up at Nino’s house uninvited before, and rarely remembers important dates, sitting in the living room with mountains of home cooking. 

“Nino?” Ohno asks, with a little wrinkle between his eyebrows.

Nino suddenly realizes he hasn’t spoken since he let Ohno in, and that he’s been staring blankly into space instead. He jerks himself back to the present, and plasters on a smile. “Sorry, just spaced out a bit. Let’s eat!”

Ohno frowns uncertainly. “If you’re tired or something, I can go. I did just kind of barge in—”

“No, no,” Nino reassures him. “I’m fine. Really. So talk to me. Make some conversation since you came all the way over here.”

Ohno still looks a little unsure, but a grin is already sneaking onto his face, and it’s not long before they fall back into their old familiar pattern. Despite Nino’s long absence, it’s like no time has passed at all. They eat, Nino plays his video game, Ohno watches and occasionally plays long enough to be reminded why he doesn’t play video games very much. Nino makes sure their shoulders and knees stay in constant contact, and every now and then Ohno reaches up to pet Nino’s short, scratchy hair (he likes the way it feels, he says).

They don’t really talk about what they’ve been doing for the past three months, because they already know—Ohno tells Nino he filled an entire photo album with the postcards he got, and Nino kept a vigilant eye on the internet to keep up with the other Arashi members while he was gone. But even so, they are perfectly happy to talk about nothing, about anything.

But as the night wears on, Nino finds himself starting to fade much earlier than usual. He tries to stifle the yawns, and keep from glancing at the clock. Ohno makes a little more noise about leaving, but Nino talks him into staying every time. It also doesn’t help that Nino feels like there’s a countdown in his head of how much time he has to confess. It doesn’t have to be tonight. But why shouldn’t it be tonight. And another, even worse thought lurks in the back of his mind as well. Maybe he’s wrong.

Yes, he thought about Ohno a lot while he was gone, yes he likes being around him all the time and touching him all the time, but does that necessarily mean he’s _in love_ with the other man? He can’t deny a certain amount of lust on his part, but he also doesn’t want to risk one of the closest friendships he has because of an overactive sex drive. And what if Leader doesn’t feel the same? Nino has refused to think about that possibility so far, and when he tries to imagine it now, he still just faces a huge blank. 

He’s staring off into space again when Ohno returns from a trip to the kitchen. Out of the corner of his eye he sees the older man stop just outside the kitchen doorway.

“You know, I think I better go after all,” Ohno says, watching Nino with a concerned frown. “You’re definitely still jet-lagged. I’ll let you rest.”

Ohno makes a small movement towards the door, and in a moment of panic Nino jumps up and blurts out a strangled “No!”

“Hm?” Ohno pauses. One eyebrow goes up curiously.

Nino can’t hold his gaze, and looks down at his feet while crossing his arms tightly over his chest. The comfortable atmosphere from a few minutes before has evaporated. Nino feels like every muscle in his body is drawn tight. Maybe he shouldn’t do this. Maybe another time would be better after all. But then he’s speaking again before he can stop himself.

“Well, I mean—I just…have something important to tell you, so…don’t go…yet.”

Though he can’t see the older man, Nino hears Ohno walking towards him.

“Something important?” 

And suddenly Ohno is directly in front of Nino, ducking his head to look into Nino’s downturned face.

“Gah!” Nino jumps and turns away. He rubs a hand nervously over his bristly head. “I can’t say it if you’re staring right at me like that,” and he makes a little “ch” of irritation.

There’s a pause, and then Nino feels Ohno’s chin settle against his shoulder. A moment later, Leader’s voice speaks close to his ear.

“How about like this?”

With his nerves as tightly wound as they are, the proximity of the other man should make Nino even more tense. But somehow, he finds himself relaxing into the familiar closeness that he’s been starved of for so long. Ohno’s chest is warm against his back, and that familiar smell surrounds him again. Nino’s breath goes out in a slow sigh, and he barely notices Ohno’s hands come up to rest lightly against his upper arms. Right here, right now, he can’t deny it: this is more than lust or infatuation. Nino needs Ohno, and the space inside his heart that belongs to the other man aches to have him this close, but never close enough. Nino’s next words come out with his sigh—breathily, almost unconsciously.

“I really am in love with you.”

And just like that, it’s done. He said it. He confessed. It all happened much faster than he anticipated. With this sudden realization, his heart starts hammering in his chest again.

“…Hmm?” is Ohno’s only reply.

Nino’s fingers dig into his ribs, as if that’s all that’s holding him together. “I said I’m in love with you!” His voice is a fierce whisper. “You should listen when people are telling you important things.”

After another pause, Ohno’s grasp on Nino’s arms tightens slightly. “Nino…you’re shaking.”

Nino doesn’t know what response he was expecting, but that wasn’t it. The tension he was holding in snaps almost audibly, and he jerks away from Ohno, spinning around to face the other man.

“So what?” Nino almost shouts. “Don’t you have anything to say?”

Ohno stares at his friend in surprise. There’s an almost hurt expression in his eyes, but still he doesn’t speak. Nino’s ragged breathing seems to fill the room. 

“Well?” he demands. His voice has lost some of its edge, and is shaking a little like the rest of him.

“I’m listening,” Ohno says finally. His voice is soft and measured. “I heard you.”

None of this is going at all like Nino had imagined or hoped. He holds on to his small shards of unreasonable anger to ward off the fear and uncertainty that are threatening to consume him.

“Well?” he says again.

“I…” Ohno trails off, shakes his head in a bewildered fashion. 

Nino knows what’s coming. This is where Ohno turns him down, tells him he doesn’t feel the same, hopes they can still be friends. The younger man squeezes his eyes shut. He wants to run away, just walk out of the apartment and stay gone for as long as it takes Ohno to leave, but his feet refuse to obey him. So he waits, but the apologetic speech he’s expecting never comes.

“I…” Ohno starts again, “…I’ve been in love with you for years, Nino.”

Nino’s head snaps up and his eyes fly open. The look on Ohno’s face is still confused, hurt, and now Nino can detect a little anger in the older man’s voice.

“I thought I was being pretty obvious about it,” Ohno continues, his words coming out in a quiet torrent. “But it was always just a game with you, you treated everything like it was a joke. It was fine if you were hugging me or touching me, but whenever I reached out to you I got pushed away. Everything had to be on your terms, and I could never figure it out, and I just couldn’t…” 

Ohno finally loses his steam, and Nino doesn’t think he’s ever heard Leader say that many sentences together when it wasn’t scripted. Nino knows he should say something, apologize maybe, or explain himself, but he’s completely dumbfounded. Eventually, Ohno’s expression softens, and he raises a hand in Nino’s direction.

“C’mere.”

Nino moves like a sleepwalker, stepping forward slowly and placing a hand in Ohno’s without thinking about what he’s doing. Instinctively, their fingers twine together. When the older man’s other hand comes up and closes around Nino’s bicep, Nino’s free hand curls loosely around Ohno’s elbow. Each second seems to stretch into an eternity, and Nino eventually lowers his gaze again. Ever since he stopped speaking, Ohno has been staring at Nino, silently working things out in his thoughtful Leader-like way, but finally, Nino can’t take the scrutiny any longer.

“You should have said something,” he says quietly, feeling inexplicably shy under Ohno’s unbroken stare.

“ _You_ never said anything,” Ohno points out, a hint of amusement in his voice.

“Well, no, but…” Nino falters momentarily, then finds the courage to meet Ohno’s eyes again. “Well, I’m saying something _now_.”

“I’m glad,” Ohno says, and there’s a smile on his face. 

They grin stupidly at each other for a few moments, then a small crease forms between Ohno’s brows. His hand moves up to rest gently against Nino’s face before he speaks again.

“Can I,” he begins hesitantly. “I mean, would it be okay…if I kissed you?”

Nino’s breath catches in his throat, and then he throws his head back in a sudden burst of laughter. “Why do you even have to ask?”

Apparently unaware that it was a rhetorical question, Ohno frowns a little and starts to explain. “Well, it’s just that you seem really nervous, so I wasn’t sure if—”

But Nino leans in to press his lips to Ohno’s, giving him all the answer he needs.

**Author's Note:**

> this actually started as two fics, and then i thought they sort of complemented each other, and so they became one ;p also, the prologue bit was semi-inspired by "fight song" - i hear that nino wrote it while he was in america, and I wondered what inspired him ~


End file.
